On Tuesday, April 28, 2026, the Avalon Passion was docked in Bratislava, Slovakia, and we started the morning with a hike up to Bratislava Castle.

The climb itself was fun, with views opening up over the city as we made our way higher. Bratislava has a beautiful old-world feel, with castle walls, narrow streets, and a sense that history is never very far away. But the real theme of the morning quickly became something much less royal than a castle: finding a bathroom.

Every trip has a quest. Some people search for ancient ruins. Some search for famous art. We searched for a bathroom.

One of us needed to go, so we stopped at the first café bathroom we could find. Unfortunately, they would not let us use it because we did not have euros and were not customers. At that point, we were hiking, not trying to sit down for food, so we kept going.

At the castle, we tried the museum, but it was closed — and the bathroom was locked. From there, we followed bathroom signs that seemed designed less for convenience and more for a scavenger hunt. The signs led us wandering all over the castle grounds until we finally found a bathroom at the very, very, very back.

Teyauna went in but did not have euros because we had not taken any out yet. She asked if she could use the bathroom, explaining she had no euros. They told her she had to pay. She said she did not have a credit card either, because she was not with us at that exact moment. They replied that she was on vacation, so of course she had a credit card.

Which would have been a stronger argument if her credit card had magically appeared in her hand.

It did not.

By the time we met back up with her, the situation was getting a little desperate. So we found a café, bought a pistachio croissant, and then finally earned the sacred privilege of using the bathroom. The croissant became less of a pastry and more of a key to civilization.

Meanwhile, Zakary was having his own adventure.

He had been sitting on a bench, minding his own business, when suddenly he looked around and realized his entire family had disappeared. When he tried to go down through one of the entrances, a horde of tourists had gathered there taking photos, blocking his path. By the time he finally got through, everyone was gone.

So Zak stood there until we found him — or more accurately, Kirsten found him.

Then Zakary had his own bathroom emergency. Unfortunately, he had not been with Kirsten and Teyauna when they finally accessed the café bathroom, so he went searching for another solution. He found a bush, but the bush came with a bonus feature: a poisonous plant. He brushed his arm against it and said it felt like “shooting acid” on his skin.

So, after all that, he still never actually used the bathroom.

This is the kind of travel story that does not make the brochure. “Visit Bratislava: castles, views, charming streets, and a family bathroom saga you will discuss for years.”

Kirsten and Zakary eventually headed back down toward the ship, while Kirsten tried to reconnect with Normand and Teyauna in the old medieval village area. The streets were filled with old shops, little corners, and interesting things to notice. Teyauna found a postcard to send to her Opa, who is from Hamburg but lives in Victoria. She picked one out in a fun little shop, and after wandering for a while, she mailed it.

Normand also got a photo of the famous Bratislava statue of the man coming out of the sewer, which added another odd little highlight to a day already full of bathroom-related drama. Somehow, after all the bathroom searching, a statue of a man emerging from a sewer felt strangely on theme.

After that, the day quieted down. We returned to the ship, had dinner on board, and called it a night.

Bratislava may have given us castle views and medieval streets, but what we will probably remember most is the great bathroom quest, the pistachio croissant that saved the day, Zakary’s poisonous plant encounter, and Teyauna’s postcard to Opa.